SoldierGrrrl (soldiergrrrl) wrote in feminist_101,

I think it's derailing, but...

I'm brand new to the comm, so please forgive me if I step on toes...

I'm currently looking for a website, article, whatever that can help me explain (or at least give me a clue by four to use on some denser online acquaintances) about discussions. Basically, I need something that explains why it's okay to leave discussions about what happens to marginalized groups to those groups and not go cluntering in with your non-marginalized experiences.

I've looked at Derailing For Dummies, and I don't see it addressed specifically.

I'm sick and tired of explaining to someone why I don't CARE what his experiences are as a man dealing with the Army's sexual assault policies or Equal Opportunity issues are, but rather I'm interested in how it affects women and women only. Heck, not just the Army, but rape discussions as a whole, along with any discussion about sexual harassment, sexual assault or anything of that nature. If I try to shut down the discussion, I'm accused of being closed minded and not willing to see that there are two sides to every issue. *eyeroll*

This man simply doesn't get that his experiences are tangential, not welcome and quite frankly, demeaning.

So, uh...help?
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